Travelling to US is on my list of least favourite things to do. Unfortunately its usually unavoidable.
Phase 1: 5 am, Changi International Airport, "Pre"-check-in procedure for a US bound flight.
She: Ma'am, could I ask you a few questions
Me : Sure.
She: "You are travelling to US"
Me : Is that a trick question?
"Yes." *Smile* "On transit to Canada."
She: "So what are the contents of your bags?"
Me : Oh, you don't want to ask a girl that!! At this moment, I make a mental check -- Zillions of clothes- winter clothes, going-out clothes, sporty clothes, shoes,.... did I forget anything? "Just Personal stuff!"
She: So, who packed your bags!?
Me : "Me, of course." Is that a rhetorical question?
She: Did anyone else give you anything to take with you?
Me : How I wish! A few more clothes would do me no harm. "No."
She: Are you sure ma'am?
Me :Sure, confident, lock kiya jaye? " Yes, very sure."
She: Do you have any electronics with you?
Me : Just a digital camera!
She: Ok, from now till you board the flight, please don't accept anything from anyone!
Me : *Kinda scared by now* I was just planning to get some books from the book shop, and theoretically that would be accepting something from some one, right? (Ha ha ha, the Smart alec strikes back!)
She: Of course you can.
Phase 2: Around 6 am. Boarding Gate
He: Miss, can you take off your shoes, belt, jacket and also remove all the cellphones, coins, knives, swords, bazookas, Ak-47s, matchboxes, lighters, fire extinguishers, nailcutters etc. from your pockets.
Me: Ok. Wow! Thats a long list.
*I trudge across and pull my shoes on.*
She: Can you take off your sneakers again?
Me : AAAAArrggghhhh. "Yes, of course."
She takes it and puts it on the table, then takes a small piece of paper and touches it all around my shoes. She puts the paper on a measuring device.
Me: MY SHOES DON'T STINK!
The machine label says something about "radioactivity". 3..2...1..*Beep*. She nods. I put on my shoes.
Me: Thanks and have a nice day.
The adventure had just started.